Psalm 27:10 "When My Father and Mother Forsake Me, Then My ABBA Will Take Me Up"

My first memory of witnessing the cries of my mother was at the age of five. We were in a hotel room with the lights off and the television on. My sister was two and a half years of age; my brother was seven months old. My mother was in search of a husband/father who had abandoned us for his music career and to travel on the road. I became a man, counselor and protector. The first fight I had with a man was at the age of fourteen to keep him away from my sister I tried so hard to be the glue and a hope to my mother, younger sister and brother at that precise moment in time. I promised my mother that all would be well and that I would take care of my family. I failed. I was too young, vulnerable, and not mentally mature enough to battle all the demons attacking my immediate family. I was helpless. My mother went on to develop mental illness that affect her to this day and thus has destroyed normal relations with us. I became the brunt of her anger and abuse due to being the oldest. My sister and brother and I, went on to live a life in and out of foster homes, relatives and associates, between the ages of five to seventeen. All those places were cruel with the exception of the short while we lived with our grandfather who passed away after eight joyous months of living with him. After our grandfathers passing away (The first man I have ever personally known), our step-grandmother showed us who she truly was and kicked myself out first and then my sister. Family, society, programs and school failed us. The source started with my father who is estranged to me unto this day. My mother chooses to be estranged from us living on mental health assistance. I believe the relations with my immediate sister and brother are hindered, due to them faulting me in their subconscious, for what I could not do on my own. I have let go of this guilt within myself. Today I am a man who has lived the life of the movies "Antwone Fisher" and "Good Will Hunting". I understand now that God placed me with a father, mother, family, circumstance and environment, I neither asked for nor had a choice in. I speak out to help spread light not darkness. I seek no revenge but spread the knowledge of what God has designed for me. I did not ask for my environment, I was born into it. I do not forsake or betray anyone, I was betrayed and forsaken. If I do not speak out, then I am a part of the problem. I speak not against but for the innumerable numbers of adolescents and adults that share my experiences. There are many people in this world that do not relate, or cannot.

I have been blessed to rise above all as you have and will also. The character typical of my father (the absent man/father/husband) is evident in other men in my family. This character typifies the absent father/man/husband in the world. Males that are absent physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually and financially from his family and his responsibilities. This opens up the Pandora Box for families to be destroyed by the person meant to protect us initially, the man. I have witnessed the tears of many women who are frustrated and hurt, mostly because of unwarranted struggles caused by the absent man/husband/father. The emotions come from a place where there is emotional, financial, spiritual and physical abuse. They struggle in innumerable ways and situations…

William W. Hemmans III